I have certainly been feeling much better over the last few days. I think it was a mistake to come off the Champix, and I guess I'll need to discuss this with my doctor. I mean, it's such a new drug, who knows what happens when you stop taking it?
I haven't been to see him yet. I was going to go yesterday morning, but I just imagined myself sitting there and telling him I was depressed. It made me feel a bit stupid so I didn't go. I know it's ridiculous thinking like that but it is a hard thing to do when you are faced with it.
I will have to see him anyway within the next couple of weeks, because I'll need some more Champix. I think I'll leave it until then to talk to him.
I had a great night out with the "lads" from work last night. We went to a pub and had a few pints while watching a UEFA cup match. Then we went to another pub but we didn't stay there long; it wasn't our sort of pub as it only had men in it! Then we went for a nice Indian meal and a few more pints.
I didn't think about smoking hardly at all, which is good. Also after a night out like that in the past, I used to feel terrible for the whole of the next day. However, although today I have a bit of a hangover, at least my mouth doesn't feel like total shite! I used to get through two whole packets of fags in just one night!
I am now almost certain that I will never smoke again.
Saved so far £462.00
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2 comments:
I am wondering why you think it was a mistake to go off the Champix when you report that you are feeling better. At some point you are going to have to live without that also. You don't want to trade one addiction for another.
I really think that because we can not see the positive effects on our bodies day by day of not smoking, then it makes it easier to rationalize that smoking is not so bad after all. This is part of the psychological addiction that in many ways is harder to kick then the physical addiction. The mind is so much stronger than the body in leading us down certain paths that it takes alot of willpower to overcome it. We need to keep focused on the long term goal of finally being a "non - smoker".
You know, I read an article about the Science of Adiction where they show MRIs of addicts brains and how they change after withdrawl. It claimed that it takes about a year before the brain gets "reset" to where it was pre-addiction. And I think that nicotine addiction is probably no different in many ways. The cravings remain even after the substance has long since left the body.
The most important thing is that we are all getting "clean time" even if you need the Champix in the mean time to get over the hump. You are nearing 60 days now and I think these anniversaries are a time to mark it with reflection and a small pat on the back for what you have accomplished so far and a restating of your resolve to win this battle.
Keep it up Pete, for yourself and the Loved ones in your Life, and for the rest of us on this journey of sobriety from Nicotine.
I thought I was feeling better at first. I'm not sure why that was, but maybe it was just psychological. By the 4th day I started to feel even more depressed than I was before so I started taking it again.
You're right that I have to come off it at some point, but I think I'd be better discussing when to stop taking it with my doctor, rather than just deciding for myself. I have to see him this week to get some more Champix so it'll be interesting to see what he says.
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