Yesterday evening was terrible! I felt very depressed and couldn't be bothered to do anything. That's why I'm writing this today rather than yesterday. I feel a bit better today (although it's only 10am) so let's hope that yesterday was the peak!
It's now 14:30 and I just had a really bad craving. I was thinking of going to buy 10, just having a couple now and saving the rest for future emergencies. That would have been stupid wouldn't it?
Anyway, I had a cup of coffee instead and the craving seems to have gone a bit now.
It's the evening now and nowhere near as bad as yesterday. I was just watching something on BBC4 which had The Jam on it (a pop group from the 80s if you're too young to remember).
I immediately thought "I used to smoke then!". Now, I remember thinking the same sort of thing years ago when I had "lost in love", you know, you've been dumped and you see something and you think "I was still with her then". Everything seems against you and the world might as well end. Well it wasn't and it didn't, and when I think back to those moments now, I think what a fool I was.
Imagine if you could have got rid of those awful feelings by nipping down to the shop and buying her back for a fiver! Sure it would have solved the short-term problems, but I'm so glad I wasn't able to do it, as my life would have been so much worse in the longer term.
I'm now able to liken the experience to cigarettes. They've dumped me so I'll have to get over it and move on. So I will and my life will be better for it in the long-term.
Saved so far £49.50
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